Nothing..,

when your thoughts follow you more than your fragile heart can handle. when the night comes and your little world dresses in black and mourns over the sun light that slipped away. When there "isn't enough wind to rip the nails out of the past". When you suddenly miss everyone you've ever knew, and almost regret the choices you've made.. the decisions that changed your life forever. You find out that all what keeps you going.. wait.. you don't really know what keeps you going! is it the hope for a better day, or you just go on 'cuz you go on? 

when you freeze from the inside and your soul shatters. All what keeps the pieces tied together is the fear of causing any sort of pain to the ones you care about, without even wondering if they feel the same way 'cuz you just do. Your feeling are your own, they can be one-sided if you choose to. The other side shouldn't affect you whether they knew or didn't. Somehow they don't matter. They're just there as a matter of fact and nothing else. If it makes sense, your feeling are your own little private things, you can share them if you want to, but if you don't .. they'll remain pure .. exactly like the first time you got them. 

when the world slowly turns into a monster. When you shutdown on yourself and block out the world. When dreams\nightmares take over your life, and reality becomes nothing much to worry about. Faded pictures, blur memories and flashbacks become everything. Simply, when there's nothing left to lose.

"and I wish that I could,

snap my fingers, make myself disappear.

snap my fingers, get myself out of here."

vpw